ARGH!
Sometimes, life is just so fucking frustating...
What do I have to do around here...
... to get a little peace of mind and some compassion?
Losing the zest for everything in life...
(You'll stumble in my footsteps)
Bye Bye... Barca!
Just to rub it in to Barcelona fans (as if there's any)... I TOLD YOU SO. You can't go wrong with statistics. How many times have Manchester United lost at home? And what a trademark half-volley into the TOP CORNER by The Ginger Ninja from 25 yards. So all's set for an all-English final. Liverpool's going to have a tough time tomorrow at Stamford Bridge with Chelsea having the away-goal advantage.
You're so cone-y!
Today is Ben & Jerry's FREE CONE DAY... and I got none. F**K! Bummer! I don't want to talk about it... I so going to buy a tub tomorrow to console myself. Wahahaha... chocolate mint... *yummy*
And the question of the decade came in an email today :Hi Yukun,I've been subscribing to your podcast as well as the Progressions one. Your mix sets are quite confusing because I don't understand how you can put so many tracks into one mix and yet, I can't differentiate which track is which? Your mixes sound like one long 70+ minute track! I've heard mixes from other people and I can tell when another track is coming up very distinctively. Why so?To be completely honest, I rather not answer. I don't know if I should take it as a compliment or otherwise. I'm afraid my answer will seem cynical and offensive. Oh well, at least I know people are listening... and reading. At least it's not as stupid as the other email I received last month... asking me to include Tiesto and more "familiar" tunes into the podcast.
What? Next you want to make a DEDICATION to your "funky friends", asking them to stay cool or something like that. Jesus!
********************
A picture that says a thousand words... Frank Rijkaard waving goodbye to Barcelona's hopes of a Champions League final as they head towards the Theatre Of Dreams to face the inevitable... "na na na, hey hey, goodbye!"
The noob rant...
"I don't like Trance. I don't understand what's so nice about it."
"Why so?"
I think it's just so noisy and cheesy!
"OK, what do you like then?"
"I like tech house, I think it's more intelligent."
Then he proceeds to drop...
I rest my case. Bunch of noobs!
Some people should really learn not to speak at all! Opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one. But it doesn't mean you should show it because at the end of the day, you might just be shooting yourself in the foot... like SOME people... who till today continue to do so. I guess some people have skins thicker than crocodile skin... any quite honestly, they should go fornicate themselves with a shovel instead of imposing their so-called "know-it-all" opinions.
On a completely separate note... I miss having Pizza Hut home delivery... a regular size pizza, chicken wings with tons of Tobasco sauce, meatballs... and just pig out in the living room watching DVD movies and falling asleep with oily fingers.
*eeeewwww*
Different week, same shit!
I might as well say it out... Singaporeans are damn ONE WAY and very SURFACE. Sure I've met tons of locals that say they love Trance and blah blah... and when I ask who do you like? It's always the same old answer. Hello... there's more to Trance than just...
TIESTO, ARMIN VAN BUUREN, PAUL VAN DYK, FERRY CORSTEN, ABOVE & BEYOND and TIESTO. (I mentioned him twice because he's just so "good".)
If you really love the music, stop asking for the same crap all the time. Any tune becomes crap once it gets overplayed too often. I swear if I had a dollar every time some self-proclaimed trance-head request for "Traffic" or some other redundant so-called produced by Tiesto tune, I'll be living in a penthouse in District 10.
There's just so much good music out there to be discovered. Then again, I guess most Singaporeans are not adventurous and prefer to stay in their little safe environment... in the 6-feet dry well.
Bor-fucking-ring!
Another week...
Updates
********************
with Yukun, every Wednesday 8pm on Lush 99.5 FM
30th April 2008
Episode #103
01. KALAHARI SURFERS – Durga’s Belt Of Skulls
02. CRACKPOT – Tippy Tippy Toe
03. SHABAZ – Caravan
04. KURUAN – Dunya (Message To Bush Remix)
05. KNOWTORYUS – The Revenge Of The Bomberclad Joint
06. ULA (The First Singing Robot-Girl In The World) – Just An Engine
07. SABRINA MALHEIROS – Saudade Rio
(Kirk Degiorgio's As One Remix)
08. ALPHA-X – Thai Ways
09. THE SHANA & KIRAN PROJECT – The Mating Game
10. OOJAMI – Ararim (Friends, Family & Lovers Remix)
11. BOB MARLEY – Try Me (Jamaican Blend Mix)
12. LAZYBOY – Imperial
13. PHYSICS – Hush Hush
"The art of lounging..."
****************************************
Firstly, it was really nice to "gather the troops and good mates" last night for a little exclusive pre-party get-together and drinks. Thanks for Chivas Regal for making it happen. Hope the hangover was equally memorable for some of you!
And now the rant... here's what I hate A LOT. People, being "new-DJ-wannabe's", who are overwhelming patronizing yet condescending and somewhat not knowing their place on the ladder. First of all, who the fuck introduces themselves as "I'm a DJ"? Big fucking hairy deal. So my next door neighbour should met acquaintance as such then... "I'm a chicken rice hawker". 
Secondly, I hate people, especially noobs who start slamming other genres they don't understand. The reason you pick that particular style of music to DJ is because it has distinct DJ-friendly intro and outro for you to mix. You diss what I play simply because you DON'T KNOW HOW TO PLAY IT PROPERLY! And because you're a retard, you'll probably end up making a huge mess out of it. If it's so noisy, then I think that your mouth should be banned as well for over-excessive noise pollution. Before you learn how to walk, learn to respect those that help made the way... and learn to respect every other non-mainstream electronic music. And don't talk so much, especially to me, because I'm the last person on earth you want to pick a debate with.
Oh, and regarding your demo CD? You really want my comments? Don't quit your day job. I had a student once and by the fourth lesson, he was able to pitch and mix within 60 seconds. Not a big deal to any veteran but for someone that just took up the craft... it's a fucking HUGE achievement. I'm not saying I'm a good teacher... I'm saying that I can list at least 10 other DJs within your "level" that are way ahead of you in the game, in terms of technicality, talking less cock and being generally respectful. And they don't us lame-ass paint-by-numbers DJ mixing software made for lazy mofos. Boys use toys while the rest of us men... you know the score. I know I had you running for your money for almost 2 hours...
Know your fucking place in the food chain. Who the fuck are you to judge on my mixing? My peers don't even do that, and neither to I do that to them, despite us championing very different styles of music. We have the mutual respect for one another. That's the unwritten law. Until you're some big-fucking-name, then maybe you gain the so-called right to talk the way you do. Until then, for the love of every in the universe... please stop talking for 10 seconds, farmer boy(s)!
Don't get me wrong. I've absolutely nothing against new guys / gals DJs. In fact, I personally think some of them bring a breathe of freshness... musically as well as personality-wise. Thus the set up of The Mixtape Collective! I personally think those who talk a lot, generally speaking, have very little to offer in terms of substance and quality. Like one of my peer said today... "can means can, cannot means cannot, don't need to talk so much crap!"
And to the little bimbo "girlies" that ask stupid questions like "why you don't play R&B ah?" Because I think it's fucking retarded especially when you've got artistes calling themselves COMMON and 50 CENT... and it's so fucking dumb for you NON-BLACKS to embrace something that's made for the BLACK COMMUNITY. Please get real and act your RACE!
********************
Although the brand is in it's fifth year (debut 19 July 2003 at the defunct Centro) and pretty much "known" across the clubbing community, it still came as no surprised to me some (even those in the industry) still don't really know who's behind the brand. Upon presentation of the name card... "oh! I didn't know you guys are the ones behind Progressions!" Well, for the sake of everyone else and to set the record straight; allow me to present to you, the people behind Singapore's premier quality trance club night...
... currently residing in Bikini Bottom!
Not to be mistaking with the other duo...
P@t and Squarebox Head.
The weekend begins here...
For invitees... see ya later. Sorry if we are unable to invite EVERYONE as it's not really our event but rather the principal's (being the alcohol brand). Morever, the booth is not huge either. Next time round, ok? You know we still love you... so here's a fresh new podcast for you... THIS CHIVAS LIFE MIX.
Lets go back in time...
Déjà Vu. It came out in 2006 and I completely missed it. I finally managed to rent the DVD and what a ride I had watching it. One can hardly go wrong with Jerry Bruckheimer. Besides the far-fetched bending of time and space continuum theory, it had great pace and a nice decent script that had me guessing till the end. Only beef, the HAPPY ENDING. Then again, according... if you went back to the past and died there, the YOU of the past would still be alive. Hmmmpph! Notably due to the confusing complexity of the script... a truckload of goofs and inaccuracy inevitably occurred.
Side note, "Some Great Classics" is available now at my podcast.
Wot? Me Worry?
I finally managed to load a much sort-after DVD title from a friend. Note this that friend is pro-Original and respects intellectual property rights to a great deal. He would mail order DVDs / CDs just for the sake of having them and not actually bother if he is ever going to watch / listen to them.
OK, to cut the long story ultra-short...
Me : "Dude, I'm so going to make a copy of this DVD"
Him : "It's copy protection encoded."
Me : "Is that so?"
Him : "Yah, I don't think you'll be able to copy it."
Me : "Oh, really..." [insert sarcastic tone]Well, meet my little friend called the "Buzz Saw Disc"...
30 minutes later, I have my copy of the DVD. Morale of the story? There's nothing like a good challenge in life. Never say never. Never say die. There's no such thing as a dead end. So sue me then for being "resourceful"! Anti-copy... ha!
p/s I'm not advocating anything. The movie is really not available on this sedated island!
More cock and bull for you!
Oh, look who's running... with the Olympic torch in Thailand?
Anyway, no thanks to him, the Singapore Armed Forces and the Police Force have now implemented a brand new fitness test for all it's active and reserve personnels. If a man with a limp can do it, so can you!
THE NEW 49-SECOND OBSTABLE COURSE
1. Toss 7 rolls of toilet paper out the window with Olympic precision.
2. Rolls must land and foam a mini-mattress.
3. Squeeze through top window.
4. 2-metre drop onto toilet rolls.
5. Quick dash to the fence.
6. Climb DOUBLE fence (with barbwire) onto the roof of the walk-way shelter.
7. Leap from roof to finishing spot on the floor.
Attire for test... T-shirt, draw-string slacks and SANDALS!
End of the road...
Amongst about 30 other emails recently...
Samantha : "Why no Dazed Out in April?"
Answer...
And don't ask me why either.
SAF, you KNNBCCB! Understand?
While I await with bated breath to be transferred to the Mindef Reserve, I received a letter today from the Defense Ministry telling me that I'm awarded with the ORNS Completion Award (Operationally Ready National Service) of S$300 for fulfilling my military liability to the country. Damn Chee Bye (*cunt), right? 
Frankly speaking, I feel that it's a fucking insult. After discharging 2.5 years of full-time plus over 10 years of reservist obligations... after the years of sacrifice, sweat, blood (and some tears where applicable), risks, liabilities and responsibilities, are you trying to tell me that I'm only worth S$300 (plus that yearly tax refief, a Hamilton watch and some cheap medal). What's S$300 in these times of high-rising cost of living?
Thank you very much for insulting all NSmen with this pathetic gesture! The US Army rewards its veterans with subsidized education for their kids, interest-free housing loan and other related benefits. Fucking hell, the FOREIGN TALENTS in Singapore get better benefits from the State. They are better off without having to waste a good part of their life serving the army. We carry arms to keep the country secure but at the same time, we're invaded by foreigners who come here even to take over the jobs of the coffeeshop beer "ladies".
The ruling authorities call this State-enforced conscription "National Service" or in same cases, "National Defense". It's the liability of all eligible male citizens to serve and to protect the country... so that the fucking foreigners can feel safe enough to come over and take our fucking jobs. Call it whatever the fuck you want. Sure our army has developed over the years in its treatment of its recruits and soldiers. But technically, it's still a form of slavery or forced labour... all in the namesake of "national purposes". You won't understand my grief until you serve and complete the full military term.
Try to keep fit for 13 years (or more), otherwise you'll spend another 4 - 8 weekends of your life doing Remedial Training(RT) for failing the army's annual fitness test. It is one thing to be fit when young, but as you get older? This is a perfect example that Singaporeans don't have FREEDOM. There's no such thing. The State owns you, one way or the other. For most male citizens, if we ever leave Singapore for more than 24 hours, it's a chargeable offense if we fail to inform the relevant authorities. What freedom, I ask again?
Must scrub toilet... contribute to National Security!How does being called names like "Chee Bye" and "motherfucker" constitute to national security? Is being made to buy breakfast for the Company Sergeant Major (or any rank higher than yours) considered a national purpose? Does cleaning the toilet and keeping your bunk spotlessly clean, contribute to our Nation's defense. Yeah, riiiiiggghht! Chee Bye, understand!
Excuse the swearing. The one thing that I learnt during my days in the army was how to swear vulgarities profusely and effectively. Fuck... the amount of swear words I've used during my stint is so much more than in the real world or in any movie ever made. And it's not true that National Service makes a man out of you. When you finish your two-year duty, women your age will find you extremely boring and childish. Admit it, even till now, you'll keep talking about army life at every given opportunity, at any possible gathering!
One positive thing that came out from my tour of duty (having gone through one hijacking rescue and a border skirmish up north), I've developed a tendency to question "authority figures" and everything they say. Thus, I'm not so gullible like most idiotic Singapore heartlanders are.
The powers-on-top can continue going around declaring how good our country's defense and economy are; whilst the entire country twiddle their thumbs and wonders WHEN we will ever "catch" Mas Selamat. Seriously, how fucking impartial was the ministerial statement? Not everyone is that fucking stupid, ok? Any reservist would know that the report is basically stating the obvious... and to discipline and penalize the most junior in rank and file. But more salary bonus to the Minister of Home Affairs for running and otherwise "tight" ship. 
So we are made to believe that a lack of a simple window grille resulted in the escape of the terrorist? You seriously want the world to laugh at how pathetic you are at cooking up tales? So you're saying that the careers of the two gurkhas, one ISD junior female staff (a woman asked to guard a male prisoner?), and the commandant of the facility have to "hentak-kaki" (stall) because of window grilles?
And why no grilles? Oh, it's because of red tape and Government protocol, isn't it? As per instructions since the days of the T-Rex, in order to appoint a contractor for the job, you'd need to have THREE seperate quotations, submit to the relevant department, and wait for further instructions as to who you should assign the job to... usually to the cheapest one. So much of initiative!
And you're saying it took only 49 seconds for the prisoner to get from the toilet to the outside of the converged perimeter fences. Did you detain a terrorist or a superhero? Never mind that... it just gets more embarrassing, doesn't it? And just so happens the two CCTVs covering outer and perimeter fences were not actively monitored. Either Mas Selamat is a damn lucky bastard or there's just too many convenient coincidences. It's just sad that we can spend billions on ministerial salaries, but we cannot detain ONE terrorist... or a least hired a proper Hollywood scriptwriter to cook up a better story.
Fact remains that Singapore is a laughing stock in the eyes of the world. Sure we're "world-class" in almost everything but our highly-secured detention centre don't have window grilles in the toilets. Shame on you Singapore, for having clean but not escape-proof toilets!
By the way, our in case the rest of you morons don't know and believe everything THEY tell you...
... our reservists don't look like that!
We however look like this...
"Sleeping on the job"Tentera Singapu-lah!
(yippee ki-yay, motherfucker!)
This coming weekend...
This weekend on Yukun's Podcast(which works with almost all decent mp3 players)
SOME GREAT CLASSICS, 25th April (Fri)
A new mix series for my podcast and possibly a concept sub-brand night, paying tribute and revisiting the Trance classics and anthems that just won't go... :)
THE CHIVAS LIFE MIX, 26th April (Sat)
An exclusive ultra-limited mix promo CD done for this Saturday's little private gathering... before we all get "Tyas-ed".
********************
Pre-Party of the week
Sorry. It's a private one. Limited invitees only.
********************
Party of the week
********************Quote Of The Week
... to quote DJ Fred-E :
"Onegina* is better than Nogina**!"
From the male point of context...
* having only one vagina to be be contented with;
** not having any vagina at all (i.e. bachelor that wanks-a-lot)
Today is Ben & Jerry's FREE CONE DAY... and I got none. F**K! Bummer! I don't want to talk about it... I so going to buy a tub tomorrow to console myself. Wahahaha... chocolate mint... *yummy*
And the question of the decade came in an email today :
And to the little bimbo "girlies" that ask stupid questions like "why you don't play R&B ah?" Because I think it's fucking retarded especially when you've got artistes calling themselves COMMON and 50 CENT... and it's so fucking dumb for you NON-BLACKS to embrace something that's made for the BLACK COMMUNITY. Please get real and act your RACE!
... currently residing in Bikini Bottom!
... our reservists don't look like that!
"Sleeping on the job"
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